What Is a Wake After a Funeral?

When a loved one passes, it brings forth a time of reflection, remembrance and the coming together of those acquainted with the deceased. Of the traditions that help us navigate these feelings of grief, the wake holds a unique and significant place in Australian culture. 

Wakes find their roots in traditions dating back to the time of European settlers. These traditions evolved over time, drawing influence from local conditions and communities. What was once a religious funeral practice is now common in secular communities. 

For those planning funeral services, recognising the purpose and nature of a wake can inform the planning process, while offering solace and support. Wakes provide a chance to honour memories, share stories and find comfort in community as families and friends gather.

Definition of a Wake After a Funeral

A wake has become a social gathering where family and friends join together after (or occasionally before) a funeral service, to share memories and stories of their loved one. While funeral wakes can take many forms, understanding their history can help inform modern funeral planning.

In the past, communities would hold a vigil (“the wake”), sitting with the deceased until burial, often through the night. Prayer played a significant part. In many cultures, close friends and families would rotate to ensure that a continuous watch over the body was maintained. Wakes would occur before the funeral and tended to be sombre affairs with only a few mourners in attendance at any given time.

Modern wakes have evolved into more of a communal celebration of the person’s life and is usually held after the funeral service has taken place. With a reduced focus on religious customs, the atmosphere of a modern wake tends to be highly social, providing an element of comfort and support. These gatherings offer an opportunity for people to connect, honour the deceased and find companionship during a difficult time.

Modern wakes are larger, often comprising close family, friends and working colleagues of the departed. When it comes to funeral planning, wakes have become more structured and the family will usually consider catering, location and atmosphere in advance.

Purpose of a Wake

The wake serves as a valuable step in the grieving process. Contrasting the rigid structure of a funeral, wakes provide a more informal, lighthearted celebration. Attendees often share stories, laugh about fond memories and find solace in collective remembrance. This gathering helps transform raw grief into cherished memories, in true Australian fashion. Wakes are a way to end a traditionally mournful day on a positive note, surrounded by loved ones.

Typical Elements of a Wake in Australia

Location

Common venues for wakes in Australia are family homes, community halls or local venues.

It’s common for families to select a pub, restaurant or other location that held special meaning for the deceased, for a more personalised celebration. The location chosen often reflects the loved one’s individuality, while doubling as a comforting backdrop. During such a challenging time, a well-chosen venue provides a welcoming atmosphere where funeral-goers can share memories, stories and emotions.

Food and Beverages

As with many Australian celebrations, food plays an important role. It’s typical to serve light refreshments, finger food and alcohol. Many families opt for casual catering arrangements, emphasising comfort and practicality over lavish displays. While food is important, it is not expected to be a significant expense for the deceased’s family.

Refreshments often reflect the family’s heritage or the deceased’s favourite dishes. For example, the food a family with a Greek background serves may be completely different to somebody with Chinese roots, and this is expected. Alcohol is frequently present, but this too can vary based on religious beliefs and personal preferences.

Atmosphere

In Australian culture, the atmosphere at a wake tends to be less sombre than the formal funeral service. While respect for the deceased remains paramount, wakes are more relaxed. Ideally, conversations flow naturally between guests as they reminisce. Expect to hear laughter mixed with tears as people share stories about their loved one.

The Difference Between a Wake and Other Memorial Events

While funeral wakes share some similarities with other memorial events, they serve a distinct purpose. 

Viewings

A viewing (also known as funeral visitation or reposal) occurs prior to the main funeral. Inner family and friends come together to see the deceased following preparation by the funeral home, but prior to the funeral itself. 

As viewings place a strong focus on the deceased’s body, they necessitate an open casket. While open caskets are declining in popularity in much of the Western world, viewings still hold significance in some cultures, including those with Irish and Maori backgrounds.

Wakes and viewings share several similarities, though wakes have a stronger social focus and occur later in the grieving process.

Repasts

A repast is a ceremonial meal traditionally held after a funeral, serving as a communal gathering for mourners to share food and support each other. Compared to Australian wakes, repasts place a greater focus on food and shared comfort. Alcohol is less common and the attitude is more sombre and reflective in comparison.

While funeral wakes, viewings and memorial services share many similarities, each serves a distinct purpose, especially in the context of Australian culture where the wake fosters community bonds and remembrance. Viewings typically occur before the funeral and may include the presence of the deceased, while memorial services are generally more structured and formal. 

Conclusion

For many Australians, the wake is a cherished time that shifts the focus from mourning to celebrating the life lived. This approach helps friends and family find solace in shared memories and community support during a difficult time. We invite you to consider reflection, remembrance and coming together to honour the deceased.

If you’re navigating the challenging process of planning a funeral, know that you don’t have to do it alone. At Perth Cremations & Burials, we’re here to support you every step of the way, from organising a meaningful wake to all other aspects of your funeral plans. Let us take the weight off your shoulders during this difficult time – reach out to us today to learn how we can help you create a heartfelt tribute for your loved one.